Monday, September 29, 2014

Stories too short to make individual blog posts

1. I was traveling with my friend by train out to his house by the sea for a party. We were chatting back and forth the whole time about life and how my experience had been in Rome so far.  When we get up to get off at our stop a random guy muttered something under his breath but since it was in Italian I didn’t understand it so I just continued to get off the train with my friend. Later he told me that the guy said, “Oh, finally we don’t have to listen to her talk anymore!” #loudvoice #getoverit  

2. I was waiting for my appointment to submit my paperwork to get my permission papers to live in Italy when a big  bald guy with a white beanie cap and a huge beard, like duck dynasty big, walks to the front of the line and says: “So I’m American and I would like to attain refugee status here in Italy.”  Why would anyone want to leave the states and come live as a refugee here in Italy? What did you do that would make you want to come live as a refugee in Italy? “Dear America, I have found one of your most wanted criminals. Please come get him as soon as possible. Sincerely, I hope to never meet you alone at night.”

3. My friend and I were trying to go to a concert and we followed my GPS on my phone to the location of the auditorium.  When we get there we spend about ten minutes walking around on the outside next to the highway and when we get to the other side the auditorium entrance is across the barrier and about two stories below us. Already running late, my friend asks if my GPS could now turn us into bird so we could fly down to the bottom. Unfortunately this did not work so we run back along the side of the highway till we come to a parking garage and come up the back way where they were doing construction. “No, we’re not breaking in, we have tickets, we were just uh, being creative with our entrance.” 

4. Vespas, or motorcycles, do in fact drive down the sidewalk.  While standing on the corner of a street chatting with a friend not one, not, two, but three different vespas turned onto the sidewalk and drive continue driving along with the other pedestrians. #notenoughroom #imwalkinghere! 


5. American idioms and phrases can become misunderstood very quickly. “I’ve gotta hand it to you” can literally mean that you give someone your hand; “Cat got your tongue?” would cause people to look around for an actual cat or check to see if your tongue is still in your mouth; and “Fly by the seat of your pants” just gets weird looks or if you’re from the UK it might mean “Fly by the seat of your underwear.” #language #communicationisfunny 

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